Values and the power of self reflection

                    What do we value most in our lives?  Not to go all Fight Club on you guys, but this question popped into my head today while browsing the interwebs.  Today just happens to be my 9 year anniversary with Bug.  Earlier we were talking and I told him the things I look forward to when getting older.  Mainly my hope is that we will run around pranking people like on Betty White's Off Their Rockers.  But I also look forward to eating soft foods while guessing the answers to things on the game show network.  Which brings me back to my question.  What do we value most in life?  What is it that we look forward to at the end of the day?  What do we hope to get out of life?
   
                     Sure a nice job and cushy life style is appealing to all.  I even try to convince Clay to call out frequently to spend the day with me.  We dream of a day when we win the lottery, pay off the debt, and stay home together.  But it's not the money I desire (although it would help with some of my stressful things in life).  It's the time.

                    I spend hours at a time on Pinterest.  It's my favorite way to hoard (I am currently sitting at 34 boards with over 3000 pins).  I look at all kinds of stuff.  Crafts, houses, people, nerd stuff, clothes, humor sites, food.  The list is endless.  I like the things I pin (obviously or I wouldn't pin them).  I like to see the creativity others have.  I enjoy seeing things people wear or say, or how they decorate a house.  There's something appealing to me in the form of self expression and the art of it.  I often find myself jealous of others  for multiple reasons (ie.-I wish I had thought of that!  What a cute outfit!  What a great way to organize!  Why can't I pair outfits that great!?)  What I really admire though is the fearless nature in which all of these people do these things.  Like they live life with no fear of consequence, or judgement.  Just so....free.  If you think I've gone on a tangent, just stay with me here.  The other thing I value in life is free spirits.

                  Having a free spirit means so much to me.  Those two words have more meaning to me than most.  Living without worrying about what people think of you!  This was something I had to learn about.  I had to practice not caring.  It was definitely a journey (much to long for this page, but perhaps in the future, we can discuss my journey and how I pulled myself out of the pit).  I'm still working on it.  I enjoy looking a certain way, doing certain things.  But to do them for the sole purpose of because I enjoy it?  This is still something I need to work on.

                    I also really value creativity.  The ability to see one thing, then make it something different?  Amazeballs!  In fact, I have an entire board dedicated to Great Ideas.  It's my why didn't I think of that board.  You can view it here.  I love when people let their brains go to that place that allows them to see things differently.  I absolutely love it.

                  So really, what do we value most in life?  I really value time.  It means more to me than having the nicest house, no debt, fancy cars, vacations, endless gifts.  If people were willing to spend more time with loved ones or even doing what they loved (rather than expectations), I feel we'd all be a lot happier.  Free Spirits.  To live courageously, fearlessly and freely is something I truly admire.  I really aim to do this more often.  I just know I will be happier and healthier if I do so.  And finally creativity. To let your brain see no ranges, no walls, no limits.  I love this.

                  I'm sure if I kept pondering this and kept writing, I could go on for days.  I would come up with a huge list of what I deem most important.  What I hope to get out of life.  What I love.  What really means something to me.  Instead of boring you with an enormous post however, I will invite you to do some self reflection.  Find out what really has meaning in your life.  I promise you, self reflection is going to make you feel sooooo much better.


     Until next time lovelies.
xoxoxoxo
    Trista

The POWER of COMPASSION

                 Today I want to talk about compassion.  Recently I have had quite the trauma happen (collapsed right lung, blog to follow with x ray pics and some excruciating details), and it led me to some very strange, albeit great things.  I've entered an area of soul searching, feeling quite lost and confused at times, but knowing that if I just go with the flow, somehow, it will all work out.  I've been brought to tears on many occasions, and started a journal and wrote until iv's made me bleed.  All things considered, I'm quite alright.  A little sore from surgeries, lots of bruises from needles, weak with no energy and a little sick from medication.  What has amazed me most is the love I've been getting from everyone.
     
                I was in the hospital for two weeks.  My husband was completely rock solid and by my side the entire time.  He seriously slept next to me every night, held my hand, and stayed there all day.  He didn't want to leave to eat or shower or feed the dog, but he had to.  The rest of my family came to see me when they could, fighting around work schedules, general goings on with life, and other family things.  My grandparents from California sent a gift up from the gift shop.  Not sure if that's allowed, but I loved it and it made me cry.  In addition to all that I had so many visitors, it really made me feel the love.

                One girl I need to mention is one who I used to work with over a year ago at American Eagle Outfitters.  I was feeling extremely down one night and sent out a text to a few people.  I asked for prayers, positive vibes anything anyone could spare a little of to help me through the pain and fear I was feeling.  A day later she showed up in my hospital room bearing gifts.  She brought me gifts so personalized and so me that I cried.  She remembered favorite foods, favorite drinks, the fact that I had gone cruelty free, my nickname from working there and my favorite colors.  It was so great.  I didn't realize that someone knew me so well and cared so much to do something like that.  

                The next thing I need to mention is giving.  While being in the hospital and surgery is stressful enough, the next stressful thing is realizing how much work you've missed and the anticipation of all the bills.  Soon I'll have all my regular bills from car insurance to phone, car payment to credit card and now a shiny new hospital bill.  I can't wait (sense the tone).  I'm already stressing and I know that's not good for me.  I can't really help it.  It's already plaguing my mind and nightmares.  However, everyone has been telling me not to stress about it, that it's inconvenient but a necessary evil.  I know they're right.  However, I mentioned to a friend of mine that I was concerned about falling behind.  This friend text me back almost right away and told me that if I needed anything to let them know since they would be getting their tax return soon.  Now this friend is somewhat down on their luck.   I won't get into the details out of respect for their privacy but it meant so much for them to offer.  

            You guys all have no idea how much you mean to me.  How much your positivity helps me.  How much you have all changed my life and made me better from being there. I love you and consider you all family.  

Special Thanks and so much love goes to:   Clayton Latz, Susan Tuzik, Johnny Lasswell, Debbie Langley, Tony Langley, Linda Tuzik, Heather Nickle, Terry Nickle, Aaron Nickle, Sharon and Jim, Jenn, Kat, Kim, Mary, James, Jack'ee, Gaby, Armando, Alex, Eli, Steph, Joanie and Wilbur, All my family, friends and loved ones who visited, text, called, prayed, thought about or sent positive vibes my way.   I love you.